Not Alone
by astoryofus
Summary: [ DISCONTINUED STORY ] Blaine thinks he deserves to suffer after what he has done. Kate wants to prove him wrong.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note: This is my first fanfic. Ever. Let me know what you think, yeah? Oh, and _Glee_ doesn't belong to me, obviously._

_12/18 Update: I edited this chapter so that the whole story would make more sense. Hopefully. Next one is still in the works._

* * *

Kate was riding her bike down First Avenue at a leisurely pace. She'd spent most of the day helping out with a photo shoot up in Central Park. Her friend Ben had called in a favor, saying that her involvement would also be good publicity for her career as a photographer.

Of course, she had misgivings about leaving Blaine all by himself for so long. It was nearly a month since her best friend came back from Paris to tell her that his boyfriend, whom Kate always liked, had broken up with him. She spent that night in Blaine's bed, cradling him in her arms as his body shook and heaved with sobs, each one making her own heart squeeze painfully. It took two days of prying before he told her what really happened.

The days and weeks that followed had been difficult. For both of them. He was still struggling to come to terms with the whole thing. She, on the other hand, knowing Blaine and how much Kurt meant to him, was constantly worried her best friend might do something, well, rash. So far, so good. She finally agreed to attend the photo shoot at Blaine's own insistence. "I'm not a baby, Kate. I don't need a sitter," he said. "And you don't have to miss any career opportunities on my account."

Kate had just passed the UN Plaza and thought to stop somewhere and buy dinner when The Beatles' _In My Life _started playing in her earpiece. Blaine. Letting go of the left handlebar of her bike, she reached up to push a button and take the call. "Hey, Blaine. I was just gonna call and ask if you want Indian or-"

"Kate." Blaine's voice was so soft that she could barely hear him over the traffic, but there was no mistaking that tone. Kate's heart raced, and she instinctively pedaled faster. "Kate... I'm sorry-"

"I'll be there in ten minutes, okay?" She adjusted the earpiece volume to maximum before swerving to overtake another biker. "Do you hear me, Blaine?" She thought about calling an ambulance but decided against it. Blaine hated hospitals, and he'd made her promise long ago never to take him to one unless it was a matter of life and death. For all she knew, this could be one, but she trusted him enough to hope this wasn't _too_ serious. "Come on, Blaine, talk to me."

She heard him take a shuddering breath. "I feel so... tired, Kate. Numb. I just wanted to feel something again." His voice had grown even softer, which was really scaring her.

"Keep talking, Blaine."

"I'm really sorry," he whispered, before the line went dead.


	2. Chapter 2

_Author's Note: I edited the first chapter, so you might want to give it a quick reread before continuing with this next one. Which is _way_ longer. Cheers._

* * *

Kate practically slammed her bike into the bike rack outside their building, barely hearing the lock snap into place. She dashed up the front steps and into the lobby. No time to wait for the elevator, which was only on its way up to the third floor. She climbed the stairs two at a time and arrived breathless outside their fifth-floor apartment. She jammed the key into the lock and rushed inside, looking around wildly and fearing the worst.

"Oh, Blaine..." Kate found him on the living room floor, slumped against the couch with his eyes closed. Blood trickled steadily from two nasty-looking cuts on his left arm, forming a thankfully small puddle on the hardwood. A broken beer bottle lay nearby, the largest fragment - its sharp, pointed edge bloody - inches from Blaine's right hand, which now held his cellphone. Relieved somewhat that the situation wasn't as serious as she'd feared, Kate hurried to her bedroom, grabbing a clean towel and her first-aid kit from the closet.

"Blaine?" Catching her breath, she knelt down beside him and pressed the towel gently but firmly against his arm. The sight of his gym bag on the couch and the faint scent of his favorite raspberry body wash told her that he'd gone out to box. As he'd done every single day for the past two weeks. For some reason, boxing hadn't been enough today. Right now he smelled strongly of beer, and only then did she notice five more empty bottles on the coffee table. Kate sighed. Drinking was never his strongest suit.

"Blaine, can you hear me?" she asked. No response. She lifted one hand from the towel and gently shook his shoulder. "Blaine." His eyelids fluttered open, his brow furrowing in either confusion or pain. Quite possibly both. She waited until his hazel eyes finally focused on her.

"Hey," he said faintly. She could tell from his voice and his eyes that he'd been crying. He looked down at his arm and saw the blood seeping through the towel. He opened his mouth to speak but seemed to think better of it, turning away from her and staring glumly at the broken bottle beside him instead.

Moments passed, and neither of them spoke. Kate peeled back the towel to check the wounds and was glad to see that the bleeding had stopped. They didn't look as deep as she thought, either. She carefully applied some skin adhesive to both cuts and then went over to the kitchen sink to rinse blood off her hands.

After holding a clean rag under the faucet and wringing out the excess water, she returned to where Blaine sat, silent and unmoving, against the couch. She gently wiped the dried blood off his arm, taking care not to disturb the drying adhesive. She folded the rag over to clean up the half-dried puddle on the floor and then stood up to throw both rag and discarded towel into the trash bin. Finally, she swept up the broken beer bottle and deposited the fragments into the bin.

"Are you hungry?" she asked, washing her hands properly this time. Best to act normal for now and ask the more important questions later. "I can make us some potato soup and..." She trailed off when she saw him nod. "Okay," she said, shrugging off her jacket and tossing it onto a chair. "Get some sleep while you wait, if you want. And be careful not to reopen your wounds." Slowly Blaine got up and lowered himself onto the couch. Keeping an eye on him as she made dinner, Kate managed to finish in less than half an hour.

She put two spoons, two bowls of soup and a few slices of bread on a tray and carried it over. Setting it beside the empty bottles of beer, she saw that Blaine hadn't fallen asleep at all. After taking only a few mouthfuls of soup and a bite of bread, he set down his bowl. He didn't move to stand, though, letting Kate finish her dinner in silence.

"You really need to eat some more," she told him, putting her own bowl back on the tray. "You haven't been eating or sleeping well since you broke up with-"

"I'm fine," he said, cutting her off. Kate knew, heck, they both knew he wasn't. "I'm going to bed." Blaine got up to his feet, then swayed dangerously as soon as he took one step.

Kate caught him by the arm and made to stand up to steady him, but he abruptly pushed her away. With way more force than was necessary. Caught off balance, she fell sideways to the floor.

"I told you I'm fine!" he yelled. "I don't need any help! Just-" He stopped, seeing Kate on the floor and the look on her face. He staggered backwards until his back hit the wall, his voice sinking to a hoarse whisper. "Just leave me alone, Kate." He slid down to the floor as the tears started falling.

"I can't, Blaine." Recovering from her shock, she stood up and took two steps towards him. "And I won't leave you."

"You will," he said, his voice breaking. "You should. Everyone does, eventually. Because all I do is hurt the people I love. My mom. Kurt." He lowered his gaze to the cuts on his arm. "I deserve this. I deserve to be in pain. For all the pain that _I've_ caused..."

Without warning, he slammed the back of his head forcefully against the brick wall behind him.


End file.
